If a date a Veronica, will it help me reach my target demographic?

So there's this hot new group around yeah? Fronted by two sisters? Look edgy but also appealing to the mainstream? Lesbian incest vibe?!

The Veronicas are so hot right now. Heard Jessica is single via Wiki. Feel something coming on.

Feel if I want my band to be big, I need a hot celebrity girlfriend. Feel I can then appeal to the "E" crowd as well as my general fanbase. Need more fans. Need more friends on our myspace page. Need people to find out I'm dating a celeb so maybe they'll get some juicy goss on my blog.

Just want to become a fan.

Nobody knew/cared about The Kills until the lead singer started sniffing around Kate Moss. Probably better for her than Pete idk. Seem to love each other. Wish I can find that love but not enough people read my blog. Maybe if people started reading this girls will like me. Could be the next Perez Hilton. Is that his real name?

Just want the guys on E to appreciate me. Want to become a must read. Don't want to step out of a club at 4 o clock in the morning with my cock out because I've sinked one too many bloody mary's. Need to find a new drink other than bloody mary's.

I smell a blog.

Like The Veronicas. Seem to the modern pop stars. They even have their own clothing brand. Feel they're very marketable, like they aren't natural role models but they show girls just to be themselves, like they belong. Thinking of starting my own clothing label. Could make cool tees with slogans on the front. Teach guys to just be themselves and do their own thing.

Maybe one day they'll talk about me on E.

How to save a life

Been a sad day.

Buried a hamster today. Put it's rotting corpse into a Coco Pops box, took it to the park, laid it in the ground. Eulogy was short. Wish I said more. Hopeless at showing emotional weakness, it's ok to share HOW U FEEL.

Felt like I was in Scrubs. Felt like I was burying Brendan Fraser, or had killed my favourite patient. Need a doctorate and shit.

"Where did I go wrong
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness and
I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life."

Just trying to explain how I'm feeling with contemporary music.

Weird how pets become friends even though you can't understand them. Wish I could speak to animals. Would ask them which is their favourite high school musical (I like the summer one). Think you get a bond over time and understand each other, like friends. Thought they were just for old people who's friends have died. Feel this is selfish since they'll die soon and the pet won't have an owner, and would be made into food.

Would find it hard to eat something that used to be someone's pet.

Think there is too much love in me. Got a lot of affection, feel I can empathise with people who are experiencing loss. Might become a shrink and help people with issues idk.

Lovegame?

Think I'm starting to like Lady Gaga. Think she's a good role model, helping young ladies become women, learn to love their bodies etc, even if they're 'munters'.



Would like to poke her face.



Think she gets a rough time. Probably hangs around too much with the gay community. Never really know who the gay community are, but they get mentioned a lot. Like I've got gay friends, but none of them are part of their community. Do they go special places where you have to be gay, or just wanna chill? Might check it out.


http://sarahspy.tumblr.com/post/197700502/pre-lady-gaga-stefani-germanotta-performs





Think her image has improved since then. Used to be quite scary looking tbf, definitely has had some work done. Love when she wears a crazy outfit like the one above. She was cool at the VMAs. Made me feel accepted by her gay community. Wouldn't wear it myself, looks hard to get out.



Love her song about disco sticks. Want her to ride mine, don't care that she has one too.

Power cuts... let's chill

Came home early last night, chill by myself for a bit, watch some iplayer or something. Got into bed, put on some 'everwood' (about small town families 'n' shit). Everything went black.

Turns out whole street had power cut.

Not afraid of the dark, just need to know deets. Went outside, talked to neighbours. Seconds turned to minutes, hours etc, we were chatting about people we both know, places we've been etc, was pretty chill. Never would have ever met these people otherwise.

Was pretty chill.

Thinking this morning that I would never have talked to neighbours if it wasn't forced to me by the powercut.

Maybe this was a good thing?

Maybe my road planned this so we could make friends.

Couple of us had a street party late into the night. Couple of bros brought down their acoustic guitars and bongos, was pretty sweet. Like we can still make beautiful music together even if we didn't have porn and probably all got interrupted from wanking seshes. Didn't bring mine down, didn't want them to think I was just following everyone else, want to keep my originality on the road, want to be looked up to, not across.

Made a new friend. Going out tonight.

Planned my funeral today

Walking home, started thinking about what people would be like if I was gone. Started thinking about my own funeral. What I want and shit.

First of all, I want people to fucking weep. Hate these peeps who say shit like "I want people to be happy and laugh at my funeral". Fuck that. I want everyone there, even people I didn't like, and I want them all to be sobbing because they'd miss you. Not saying it in a mean spirited way, but if I'm not going to be providing my homies with serious lulz anymore, I would think they'd be sad about that.

Want some skinny little number at the front crying over how much she'll miss my peen.

Want a gold coffin. Need the excess, want people to know I was a big shot. Want there to be a BBC4 documentary about me. Settle for More4. Guess my appeal could be more mainstream.

Auction off all my shit and give it to my charity. Might pick the Donkey Sanctuary to fuck people up. Need one last bit of generosity before I hit the pearly gates, want to know I'll be smacking that up with my bros in heaven.

Choosing funeral song is difficult. Could be obvious and pick a Cure song, or maybe 'I Gotta Feeling' by Black Eyed Peas. Maybe something from high school musical.

Probably pick a Radiohead song. Want people to know I was intelligent and alternative.

Need a kinky 'sex thing'

Want girls to like me.

Want to have something original about me.

Make me edgy.

Friend at university told me he did kinky shit with his gf. Needles 'n' shit. Won't go into deets.

What you guys think? What kinky sex act would suit me?

Bondage? Seems to messy for me. High chance of bloodshed. Will probably just end up a disaster I guess, I dunno.

Role play? Too much effort. Embarassment taking goldilocks costume back from rental with cum and blood over it. Probably don't earn enough to pay the deposit.

Might get into seminophagia. Sounds hot. Hear you can get some sort of spiritual connection from that shit. Read on wikipedia that it can cure cancer, so don't know why more peeps aren't into it. Dunnoez.

Bukkake sounds cool. Don't know if I'd feel comfortable with wanking myself off in front all my friends, loved ones etc just to cum on one girl. Rather just stay in and see if the new Belladonna vid is up on Spankwire.

Dirty talk sounds safe. A few minutes whispering in her ear about where I want to put my junk (see "nostril") and then on to some rampant love making. Might try this next time I'm honking some chick round the back of KFC. Don't know if I'll overstep the line, but tbf she's ragging some guy behind a fast food chain so she must have no respect for herself imo.

What's the one where you shit on their chest?